Verbal abuse in a relationship
5 min readThere are many kinds of abuse but not all are physical. If someone uses words repeatedly to intimidate, degrade or control another person is deemed to be verbal abuse. It’s common to encounter verbal abuse within situations like a romantic relationship , or an adult-child relationship. However, it could also happen in other relationships with family members and social interactions, as well as at work. Abuse of the emotional or verbal kind takes an emotional cost. Sometimes, it can escalate to physical abuse, too. If you’re experiencing verbal abuse It’s not your blame. If you’re in this situation seeking assistance from an experienced online counselor via online counseling can help.
Verbal abuse is often difficult to spot and, unfortunately, can be a typical kind of abuse in certain relationships. Verbal abusers could damage your self-esteem , while seeming to be deeply concerned for your. Use of verbal abuse is often a hidden attempt to control regardless of how affectionate your spouse appears to you, the use of words can be extremely pervasive, and may be as destructive as physical abuse.
What is verbal abuse?
Verbal abuse refers to the act of violence using speech which may include threatening or shaming someone else. Verbal abuse may refer to any method a person uses their language to gain control over the relationship. It could be a way of speaking that is employed to make the other person feel less important or valued within the relationships. Verbal abuse usually targets those who are insecure, but it can take a variety of forms it can vary from shouting to humiliation, to sophisticated and manipulative strategies.
Physical abuse can be easily identified. There is no doubt that you have been abused if someone has hit you or if your spouse has hurt you. Abuse verbally is distinct. The harm is internal and there aren’t physical scars or bruises. It’s just an emotional wound. Although both have long-lasting consequences such as low self-esteem and depression, anxiety and so on emotional abuse is difficult to identify without being aware of the symptoms.
Most common patterns of verbal abuse to watch out for in a relationship are:
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Smearing
Typically, verbal abuse of this kind is the easiest to spot. It can be a sign of being targeted and/or repeatedly yelled at on a daily basis. Arguments that are always reliant on shouting and using verbal abuse in conversations are indicators that your relationship with your partner is not healthy. In a healthy, healthy relationship couples should be able to walk away from arguments or try to discuss the problem. If a relationship is abusive verbally the person who is abusive will shout until they achieve what they need.
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Lack of Respect
A light sarcasm or an abrasive tone of voice is not a necessary element of your interactions with your partner. This may also be the constant nudge in your friend’s jokes. It might start out as hilarious, and that’s why it’s often unnoticed and then, as time passes, it can turn into insulting.
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Manipulation
Sometimes it’s easy to recognize a controlling personality, especially when one continually pushes their spouse to do or say things they’re not comfortable with. Manipulation On the other hand is more difficult to recognize. It may be subtle, such as turning things around and putting blame on the abusive partner.
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Criticism
It’s okay to offer constructive criticism if requested occasionally; however, having a sincere relationship with your loved one is good for you. However, continuous criticism and snarky remarks about your significant other is not healthy, and in time can cause a substantial decrease in self-esteem.
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Demeaning Commentaries
If your partner is rude to you, or makes remarks that are based on your race/ethnicity or gender, religion, the background of your family, etc this is a sign of unhealthful. It doesn’t have to be constant, but if you have experienced it one time, it’s certain to happen time and time again and should not be considered normalized. A partner who values and values you will never employ something that is a fundamental part of you to bring your down.
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Threats
Although this might seem like something that is easy to spot but it’s not always the scenario. Threats are often disguised to make seem like they “aren’t too awful,” or in a manner that causes you to wonder whether you’ve been told the truth. But the truth is that a threat is an act of violence and a caring partner will not use threats to win their battle.
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Blame
Blame is among the most frequent kinds of verbal abuse. It includes constantly putting the blame on the other person rather than taking the responsibility for their actions. This could include blaming one’s partner for an incident that they had no involvement in or blaming the victim for the abuser’s emotional state.
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Accusations
Sometimes, due to extreme jealousy, constant accusations can be a type of verbal abuse. Being continually blamed for something frequently drives an accomplice to begin second guessing themselves on whether they are accomplishing something wrong/dressing improperly/blabbering, and so on.
If you feel as if you’re always on edge and fumbling around your partner or any of these patterns are like something you’ve experienced before, then you could be in a toxic relationship. If your family and friends are telling you something is not right, listen to them out. They might be seeing, or hearing something you can’t. Keep in mind that by creating boundaries and being transparent about how you feel, you will be able to build your confidence in relationships. For expert consultation, get online counseling for your relationship with the best couples counsellors on TalktoAngel.
If you want to find the best online professionals in mental health, go to TalktoAngel. You can get the help you need by using this search engine for “Counseling for relationship” or “Relationship counsellor.”